So, I'm back in the saddle again and ready to talk about the ladies. However, they did not give me much ammunition last night. Compared to weeks 2 and 3, week 4 was refreshingly normal. Except for the fact that it should have been called - "The Bachelor - Fear Factor Edition." I mean, I'm not a wuss, but walking on the bottom of the ocean and rappelling off a skyscraper? Who does that? I'm glad they saved the race track driving for next week so that the woman who's fiance died on the way to a race can participate. Seriously, producers? None of your 'staffers' could have made you aware of that bad decision? Anyway, back to this week....
Michelle - no, wait, I'm saving her for last. I like my crazy for dessert.
Chantal - my biggest regret this season is that I did not pick up on how awesome she is in the first episode. She seems like a down to earth girl - very Alli like. Not me, Alli, Bachlorette Alli. Having never been in a helicopter, I was only more jealous that one has never landed in my driveway. Especially right in front of all my competition that had to link arms to keep from being blow away. Talk about feeling like Cinderella with ugly stepsisters. She was a trooper with walking on the ocean floor - I love the water, but that would have had me terrified. While the astronaut style kiss was a little lame, I think it stayed on the cute side. :) Watching the two of them together, they're very natural. And I won't even give her flack for crying about him brining Emily the picnic basket. That was a bit over the top and individual for a rose ceremony. Plus, she didn't cry in front of him. Kudos to you Chantal. Ashley H, take notes. It's called self-control. On top of all that, she hates Michelle! Chantal, you're alright in my book.
Ashley H - she has a new name - DD. Nope, not speaking of her bust size; Debbie Downer. This girl has a knack for taking everyone in the group down a couple pegs just when you're about to have a good time. Shots in a hot tub? Nope, not fun at all. About to get a rose from Brad? According to Ashley, that's awkward. Nice work, DD, random Britt got the rose instead. While you are playing the damsel in distress role to a T for Brad, I think he'll burn out on you quickly. But, maybe this is my fault. I mean, how many dentists do you know with a positive outlook on life?
Emily - I can't say anything bad about this girl. She is so sugary sweet that you want to think it's fake, but I think it's legitimate. I mean, she left presents everyday for her daughter while she was gone. How thoughtful is that? (and, how hysterical is it that her daughter told her it was okay if she wanted to stay longer so she could get more presents? :) Brad is clearly head over heels (as demonstrated by the picnic basket) for Emily, but I'm not sure about her feelings towards him. I can't recall who made the comment "do you think he has a ring in that basket?" but I think Brad debated including one. Brad wants her there for the long haul, but if the previews are any indication, I think we're in countdown mode until she breaks his heart.
Michelle - okay, I saved the best (?) for last. While Michelle may be entertaining, I'm on my last legs with her. Her level of delusion and the fact she could not be more self-centered are wearing thin for me. For any of you Real Housewives of Beverly Hills fans, Michelle is the blond Camille. Where to start, where to start. Okay, let's go with the random black eye. Now, I'm not a doctor, but that's unusual. What makes it psycho is to continue harping on it, claiming you beat yourself up in your sleep because of stress (WHAT?!?!?) and pointing it out to Brad in a pissed off tone. He didn't do anything. Although she did claim she would give him a black eye if he didn't give her the one on one date. Ashley S made the comment I would have - "I wish I had given Michelle that black eye." When Chantal pointed out to Michelle that her card was the only one that didn't say LOVE on it somewhere, I laughed out loud at the face Michelle made. "What does this mean?!?!" Nothing you wackadoodle - it's your third date, and do you really think Brad is writing the cards? Really? Then while Michelle was complaining about the time Brad was spending with Ashley H on her day, Chantal was nice enough to point out that Michelle had done the same thing on the first group date. I love watching a debate where you can see the moment that the loser knows they're done. It's normally followed by a "whatever." Best to yank your man across the room and leave, Michelle. After the slowest rappel EVER down the building, Michelle and Brad had some romantic time. Moving forward.....Michelle gets back in front of the camera. (I keep wanting to call this time the confessional (a la Real World)). She drops the hammer in the confessional. BOOM. Very classy, Michelle, very classy. Disappointingly, I have her moving forward pretty far, but I don't think I can take it. Please kick her off, Brad, please.
Meghan - Now, I don't know much about Meghan, but I think she's really Alice in Wonderland. She RAN out of the rose ceremony like she was late, late for a very important date. Wonder where she was headed. Back to reality?
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Bachelor Brad / Take 2: Week 3 - Daddy Issues
First of all – I must apologize to Emily. Last week, I was convinced she was the love child of Dolly Parton and Tammy Wynette. This week, I figured it out. She is Ellie Mae Clampett. I love her, but she is. And you know it, so don’t be mad at me for saying it.
Quote of the night belongs to Michelle – “In the end – it will just be me and Brad in Tahiti – practicing making babies”
We start off with a one-on-one date with Ashley S who has a close second for quote of the night – “I know my accent is, like, really charming; but my singing voice is not”. Um, like, what??? The only person who thinks her accent is “like, really charming” is the casting agent from “Coal Miner’s Daughter”. Unfortunately, there isn’t a remake in 2011, so Sissy Spacek’s classic performance is more than safe.
Quote of the night from Brad “I picked the perfect girl for this” what you didn’t hear from him was his quote saying, “because she’s the only one that sings worse than me”. Wow. I can’t remember the last time I wished my satellite would quit working. Finally, we get to hear Seal belt out his greatest hit and the romance starts. Then Seal starts singing another one of his “hits”. Too bad the only song any of them have heard of was “Kiss from a Rose” so a little heavy petting commences. A little tip to Ashley S – save the thigh hold for at least the second date. On second thought, I guess considering you grabbed his butt on the introduction – you are probably up to the thigh hold already.
After that we move to a romantic location / aka we’ve had more wine – so Ashley S starts with the deep download on her daddy issues. Brad has no choice but to give her a rose.
Camera right to the recording studio and the action film. Michelle wants the ninjas to kidnap and murder the other girls in the desert. Nice.
Later, at the mansion – Ashley S has lost all her bathing suit cover ups and is sitting around in her bikini when Emily gets notice of a one-on-one date! Oh me, exclaims Ellie Mae. I hope Brad doesn’t run for the hills.
Back to the filming at the studio - Brad may be the worst actor in history. Shawntel, on the other hand, has the ability to kick your ass and then embalm you and make you pretty for your relatives afterwards. Yeah, Michelle – you’re right – Brad looked like he hated being kissed by Shawntel…
Back at the hotel, let’s jump in the pool! Brad pops the cork on a bottle of champagne that magically fills 10 glasses. First one-on-one time is with Chantal and also coincides with the release of the first tears of the evening. Surely, not the last. The big reveal - more Daddy issues! Are you kidding me? Luckily Brad developed a PhD in counseling in the last three years from his own Daddy issues, so I hope these girls are giving him a $30 dollar co-pay at least. I don’t mean to doubt the legitimacy of the girls’ tears, but normally after I tell my darkest secret, I don’t feel like striking a sexy pose and making out. Maybe that’s why I’m single…
Back at the mansion: Jackie – you just went up in my view with your declaration – “Ah, another red wine night”. Been there, done that…
Emily / Ellie Mae – you give Southern girls a good name. You’re beautiful and strong as battery acid. Love you.
Back to the pool – Alli, who I had forgotten was even there, steals Brad away; however, little does she know that evil is lurking. Michelle shows up. Michelle is 100%, no holds barred, bat-shit crazy. When she walked into the pool house, I was thinking Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction. There are more than one bunny skeletons in that bitches’ closet! “Why don’t I ever get one-on-one time?” Um, maybe you should refer to last week’s episode where you manipulated not 1, but 2 one-on-ones. Brad – wake up – 2 weeks, 2 crying sessions. Send the bitch home!
Shawntel gets the rose! Woohoo! Anyone other than Michelle makes me happy!
Next morning – it looks like 10pm Friday night at the Sorority House and the last pretty girl is going out while all the ugly girls are watching movies, being jealous and eating pizza and raw cookie dough. Seriously ladies – you know Brad is coming over, at least put on a smile and wash the sleep out of your eyes!
I really appreciate how Brad keeps saying he has XYZ planned. Who does he think believes that? We’ve seen the show for 15 seasons – he has no say in anything. He “chose” Wine Country? Because he’s loaded and has a private plane? I think not Brad.
Madison – you’re more sensitive than I gave you credit for – you’re shedding tears over Ellie Mae’s story and her involved heart. I grew up on a farm – my dad has some big files that we use on horses’ hooves and we can help you with those teeth. You’re not a bad girl. I’m sorry for judging you so quickly.
Ellie Mae – spit it out. Stop stalling. When they walked in the barn with the candles on the ground – all I could think was – THE BARN IS GOING TO BURN DOWN. Don’t the producers realize that hay is DRIED grass??!?!?!?
Product placement number 1 – this date was sponsored by Cambria Vineyards. And finally – it’s coming out. I have to stop to get a tissue. If you’re not rooting for Ellie Mae – your heart is dead. I think Brad seriously has a thing for Emily – but even if he didn’t – he HAS to give the rose after that. (BTW - I’m still convinced Ellie Mae is the one that breaks his heart at the end!)
I’m not going to lie – when his therapist showed up – I snorted out loud. I don’t think therapy is supposed to be a made-for-tv moment. Also – I think a therapist isn’t supposed to give you advice and tell you what to do. He was bossy. Not a fan of “Jamie the LA therapist”.
Michelle feels confident. Wow – blow me over with a feather. Chantal (my number one) cracks a joke and everyone relaxes. Michelle makes a face with her beady eyes effectively putting a hex on everyone present. Seriously – the bitch is scary!
Alli tries to reel Brad in by sharing a sad Daddy story, but sadly, for her, since she didn’t shed tears, Brad didn’t fall for it and Michelle tries to steal him away again. Sorry Alli. You can’t win Brad by smiling when you share your dark secrets. He’s not looking for completely stable and well adjusted.
Chantal gets a moment with Brad and Glenn Close shows up again. Are you f’n kidding! Per Michelle – “you and I are in our first fight”. PA-SIKE-O. She obviously hasn’t seen this show before and has no idea how this show works. Sharing and fighting for and over the lone opposite sex person is how it works.
A few uneventful one-on-ones. And then – I’m starting to feel sorry for Madison again and wanting to call my dad to help her with those teeth. And then she pops them out. Now I’m freaked again. I’ve put a lot of things by my wine glass over the years, and I’ve put my wine glass by a lot of things, but my fangs – not so much! Yikes!
I got a chuckle watching the last one-on-one with Ashley H. She has figured Brad out and learned that she just needs to be a little tiny bit insecure and he will fold like a cheap tent. Good play Hermey the Dentist Elf.
Time for the rose ceremony and everyone is nervous – except crazy-ass Michelle. So loving Madison right now.
Michelle gets the first rose. Vomit. Chantal O – my girl - woo hoo. Madison shakes her head no and then broke down and kept the fangs out; definitely left things opening up to be a Bachelorette some day, sans fangs. She really turned out to be a much more interesting and sensitive girl than I gave her credit for. Brad wasted no time picking up his bourbon and getting back to the rose ceremony where Emily, Ashley S. and Jackie were holding their roses up like lighters at a Whitesnake concert. Kudos to the girls who kept giant smiles off their faces when he announced Madison was going home.
Of the leftovers I haven’t commented on – I don’t love Lindsey. When Brad called her name - “Excuse me, I need to get down there.” Really – you think they didn’t know that?? Take your fake red hair back to your Texas classroom. Dislike.
When the dust cleared – Kimberly – who I liked because she reminded me of Meghan from Rock of Love (lost on 99.9% of you) – Sarah P. – no reason to dislike - and Madison – who seriously grew on me – are gone. Next week looks like a knock down between Chantal and Michelle. My money and my bracket are on Chantal!!
If you haven’t paid Allison your money – make sure it’s on your to-do list.
So looking forward to next week!!
KC
Quote of the night belongs to Michelle – “In the end – it will just be me and Brad in Tahiti – practicing making babies”
We start off with a one-on-one date with Ashley S who has a close second for quote of the night – “I know my accent is, like, really charming; but my singing voice is not”. Um, like, what??? The only person who thinks her accent is “like, really charming” is the casting agent from “Coal Miner’s Daughter”. Unfortunately, there isn’t a remake in 2011, so Sissy Spacek’s classic performance is more than safe.
Quote of the night from Brad “I picked the perfect girl for this” what you didn’t hear from him was his quote saying, “because she’s the only one that sings worse than me”. Wow. I can’t remember the last time I wished my satellite would quit working. Finally, we get to hear Seal belt out his greatest hit and the romance starts. Then Seal starts singing another one of his “hits”. Too bad the only song any of them have heard of was “Kiss from a Rose” so a little heavy petting commences. A little tip to Ashley S – save the thigh hold for at least the second date. On second thought, I guess considering you grabbed his butt on the introduction – you are probably up to the thigh hold already.
After that we move to a romantic location / aka we’ve had more wine – so Ashley S starts with the deep download on her daddy issues. Brad has no choice but to give her a rose.
Camera right to the recording studio and the action film. Michelle wants the ninjas to kidnap and murder the other girls in the desert. Nice.
Later, at the mansion – Ashley S has lost all her bathing suit cover ups and is sitting around in her bikini when Emily gets notice of a one-on-one date! Oh me, exclaims Ellie Mae. I hope Brad doesn’t run for the hills.
Back to the filming at the studio - Brad may be the worst actor in history. Shawntel, on the other hand, has the ability to kick your ass and then embalm you and make you pretty for your relatives afterwards. Yeah, Michelle – you’re right – Brad looked like he hated being kissed by Shawntel…
Back at the hotel, let’s jump in the pool! Brad pops the cork on a bottle of champagne that magically fills 10 glasses. First one-on-one time is with Chantal and also coincides with the release of the first tears of the evening. Surely, not the last. The big reveal - more Daddy issues! Are you kidding me? Luckily Brad developed a PhD in counseling in the last three years from his own Daddy issues, so I hope these girls are giving him a $30 dollar co-pay at least. I don’t mean to doubt the legitimacy of the girls’ tears, but normally after I tell my darkest secret, I don’t feel like striking a sexy pose and making out. Maybe that’s why I’m single…
Back at the mansion: Jackie – you just went up in my view with your declaration – “Ah, another red wine night”. Been there, done that…
Emily / Ellie Mae – you give Southern girls a good name. You’re beautiful and strong as battery acid. Love you.
Back to the pool – Alli, who I had forgotten was even there, steals Brad away; however, little does she know that evil is lurking. Michelle shows up. Michelle is 100%, no holds barred, bat-shit crazy. When she walked into the pool house, I was thinking Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction. There are more than one bunny skeletons in that bitches’ closet! “Why don’t I ever get one-on-one time?” Um, maybe you should refer to last week’s episode where you manipulated not 1, but 2 one-on-ones. Brad – wake up – 2 weeks, 2 crying sessions. Send the bitch home!
Shawntel gets the rose! Woohoo! Anyone other than Michelle makes me happy!
Next morning – it looks like 10pm Friday night at the Sorority House and the last pretty girl is going out while all the ugly girls are watching movies, being jealous and eating pizza and raw cookie dough. Seriously ladies – you know Brad is coming over, at least put on a smile and wash the sleep out of your eyes!
I really appreciate how Brad keeps saying he has XYZ planned. Who does he think believes that? We’ve seen the show for 15 seasons – he has no say in anything. He “chose” Wine Country? Because he’s loaded and has a private plane? I think not Brad.
Madison – you’re more sensitive than I gave you credit for – you’re shedding tears over Ellie Mae’s story and her involved heart. I grew up on a farm – my dad has some big files that we use on horses’ hooves and we can help you with those teeth. You’re not a bad girl. I’m sorry for judging you so quickly.
Ellie Mae – spit it out. Stop stalling. When they walked in the barn with the candles on the ground – all I could think was – THE BARN IS GOING TO BURN DOWN. Don’t the producers realize that hay is DRIED grass??!?!?!?
Product placement number 1 – this date was sponsored by Cambria Vineyards. And finally – it’s coming out. I have to stop to get a tissue. If you’re not rooting for Ellie Mae – your heart is dead. I think Brad seriously has a thing for Emily – but even if he didn’t – he HAS to give the rose after that. (BTW - I’m still convinced Ellie Mae is the one that breaks his heart at the end!)
I’m not going to lie – when his therapist showed up – I snorted out loud. I don’t think therapy is supposed to be a made-for-tv moment. Also – I think a therapist isn’t supposed to give you advice and tell you what to do. He was bossy. Not a fan of “Jamie the LA therapist”.
Michelle feels confident. Wow – blow me over with a feather. Chantal (my number one) cracks a joke and everyone relaxes. Michelle makes a face with her beady eyes effectively putting a hex on everyone present. Seriously – the bitch is scary!
Alli tries to reel Brad in by sharing a sad Daddy story, but sadly, for her, since she didn’t shed tears, Brad didn’t fall for it and Michelle tries to steal him away again. Sorry Alli. You can’t win Brad by smiling when you share your dark secrets. He’s not looking for completely stable and well adjusted.
Chantal gets a moment with Brad and Glenn Close shows up again. Are you f’n kidding! Per Michelle – “you and I are in our first fight”. PA-SIKE-O. She obviously hasn’t seen this show before and has no idea how this show works. Sharing and fighting for and over the lone opposite sex person is how it works.
A few uneventful one-on-ones. And then – I’m starting to feel sorry for Madison again and wanting to call my dad to help her with those teeth. And then she pops them out. Now I’m freaked again. I’ve put a lot of things by my wine glass over the years, and I’ve put my wine glass by a lot of things, but my fangs – not so much! Yikes!
I got a chuckle watching the last one-on-one with Ashley H. She has figured Brad out and learned that she just needs to be a little tiny bit insecure and he will fold like a cheap tent. Good play Hermey the Dentist Elf.
Time for the rose ceremony and everyone is nervous – except crazy-ass Michelle. So loving Madison right now.
Michelle gets the first rose. Vomit. Chantal O – my girl - woo hoo. Madison shakes her head no and then broke down and kept the fangs out; definitely left things opening up to be a Bachelorette some day, sans fangs. She really turned out to be a much more interesting and sensitive girl than I gave her credit for. Brad wasted no time picking up his bourbon and getting back to the rose ceremony where Emily, Ashley S. and Jackie were holding their roses up like lighters at a Whitesnake concert. Kudos to the girls who kept giant smiles off their faces when he announced Madison was going home.
Of the leftovers I haven’t commented on – I don’t love Lindsey. When Brad called her name - “Excuse me, I need to get down there.” Really – you think they didn’t know that?? Take your fake red hair back to your Texas classroom. Dislike.
When the dust cleared – Kimberly – who I liked because she reminded me of Meghan from Rock of Love (lost on 99.9% of you) – Sarah P. – no reason to dislike - and Madison – who seriously grew on me – are gone. Next week looks like a knock down between Chantal and Michelle. My money and my bracket are on Chantal!!
If you haven’t paid Allison your money – make sure it’s on your to-do list.
So looking forward to next week!!
KC
Monday, January 17, 2011
Bachelor Brad / Take 2: Week 2 - Let the Drama Begin!
Well, you know you’re a big time blogger when you need a guest blogger and our own Allison has hit that status! So for weeks 2 and 3 I will be filling in for DJ Alli K who has been taking some family time. I realize I don’t hold a candle to Allison’s wit, so please don’t judge me too harshly!
With that said – I am going off memory for Week 2, so forgive any errors in the order of which things occurred, but a few things should be discussed:
We opened up with Ashley H. aka the Dancing Dentist getting the first solo date card. Is it just me or is it a coincidence that Ashley H. resembles Hermey the Dentist Elf from Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer?? I keep waiting for her to burst into song “Why am I such a misfit? I am not just a nitwit. You can't fire me, I quit. Seems I don't fit in...” Anyway, her and Brad flit around the carnival and after the obligatory shots of cuteness, they sit down and share their stories of deadbeat dads and bond. She gets a rose and they make out.
Back at the ranch, we learn there will be a 15 girl date and the claws come out! I don’t know if you guys caught this during the episode, but it was Michelle’s birthday. Her 30th birthday. And she wanted it to be special. It was her birthday. She turned 30. She just wanted to feel special. It was her birthday. That day was her birthday. It was her 30th birthday. The day they shot the PSA’s was her birthday. Sheesh. I’ve been around 5 year olds who didn’t talk about their birthday that much! The drama of the day unfolded with the ladies whining over the parts they had to play (although in Keltie’s defense, that get-up was awful! But I feel like she could have caught Brad’s eye if she took it in stride and laughed about it.) After convincing us she came to the show straight from a life spent at a nunnery, Britt shocked everyone by confusing the American Red Cross with the American Porn Association. Honest mistake.
Since it was Michelle’s birthday (not sure if you guys caught that) she was unhappy that everyone was focused on Britt and since it was her birthday, even if it wasn’t her party, she decided she could cry if she wanted to. Filming came to a halt and Brad consoled her with his first of many declarations that we would have a drama free day. Good luck with that one Brad!
Madison – you frighten me. I can’t decide if I want you to stay and be outrageous or get off the show and quit giving me nightmares!
The day of the filming was Michelle’s birthday. To reward her for her psychosis – Brad gives her a rose and she pretty much became the enemy of every girl there when she started waving the rose around in their faces.
Jackie gets the next one-on-one date and while I like Jackie, something about her bothers me. Can’t put my finger on it. Anyway, she gets the princess treatment and Brad keeps telling her she deserves it. I guess I’m cynical because I kept wondering how does Brad know that she deserves to be treated like a princess when he doesn’t even know her last name. Whatevs! They have an amazing date and get to talking and she reveals that she has only dated 2 people, and was single during college. Brad freaks out and thinks she’s a commitment-phobe. Personally – I figured maybe she was just a slut during college, but she chose not to alert Brad if that was the case. Guess it was best she didn’t tell him that since she got a rose.
Later, during the cocktail party – since it was just her birthday and she figured out how easy it was to manipulate Brad, Michelle steals him away to ask him what his favorite place to get coffee is. Seriously. She’s a nut job who can’t handle not being the center of attention. I’m pretty sure that is obvious to everyone but Brad at this point.
Meanwhile – Raichel and Melissa are fighting. About something. That no one seems to understand. Thankfully everyone’s favorite couple Ali and Roberto stop by and in a surprising act of restraint - in that neither of them were dry-humping the other – interview all the ladies. Luckily, Raichel and Melissa are too stupid to keep their mouths shut and they feel the need to discuss their fight with everyone that will listen and they both get sent home that evening. Melissa – I’m no beauty queen, but someone needs to alert you to sunscreen and moisturizer because you aren’t aging so well sweetie. The phrase ‘rode hard and put up wet’ is all I can think when I look at you.
Emily (who I can’t look at without thinking that Dolly Parton and Tammy Wynette got together and did her hair and make-up) came out as the sweetheart of week 2. She got the last pre-ceremony rose.
Along with Raichel and Melissa, Keltie took her two-toned hair and high-kicked it back to Radio City Music Hall.
Can't wait to see what Week 3 brings!!
Krysta
With that said – I am going off memory for Week 2, so forgive any errors in the order of which things occurred, but a few things should be discussed:
We opened up with Ashley H. aka the Dancing Dentist getting the first solo date card. Is it just me or is it a coincidence that Ashley H. resembles Hermey the Dentist Elf from Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer?? I keep waiting for her to burst into song “Why am I such a misfit? I am not just a nitwit. You can't fire me, I quit. Seems I don't fit in...” Anyway, her and Brad flit around the carnival and after the obligatory shots of cuteness, they sit down and share their stories of deadbeat dads and bond. She gets a rose and they make out.
Back at the ranch, we learn there will be a 15 girl date and the claws come out! I don’t know if you guys caught this during the episode, but it was Michelle’s birthday. Her 30th birthday. And she wanted it to be special. It was her birthday. She turned 30. She just wanted to feel special. It was her birthday. That day was her birthday. It was her 30th birthday. The day they shot the PSA’s was her birthday. Sheesh. I’ve been around 5 year olds who didn’t talk about their birthday that much! The drama of the day unfolded with the ladies whining over the parts they had to play (although in Keltie’s defense, that get-up was awful! But I feel like she could have caught Brad’s eye if she took it in stride and laughed about it.) After convincing us she came to the show straight from a life spent at a nunnery, Britt shocked everyone by confusing the American Red Cross with the American Porn Association. Honest mistake.
Since it was Michelle’s birthday (not sure if you guys caught that) she was unhappy that everyone was focused on Britt and since it was her birthday, even if it wasn’t her party, she decided she could cry if she wanted to. Filming came to a halt and Brad consoled her with his first of many declarations that we would have a drama free day. Good luck with that one Brad!
Madison – you frighten me. I can’t decide if I want you to stay and be outrageous or get off the show and quit giving me nightmares!
The day of the filming was Michelle’s birthday. To reward her for her psychosis – Brad gives her a rose and she pretty much became the enemy of every girl there when she started waving the rose around in their faces.
Jackie gets the next one-on-one date and while I like Jackie, something about her bothers me. Can’t put my finger on it. Anyway, she gets the princess treatment and Brad keeps telling her she deserves it. I guess I’m cynical because I kept wondering how does Brad know that she deserves to be treated like a princess when he doesn’t even know her last name. Whatevs! They have an amazing date and get to talking and she reveals that she has only dated 2 people, and was single during college. Brad freaks out and thinks she’s a commitment-phobe. Personally – I figured maybe she was just a slut during college, but she chose not to alert Brad if that was the case. Guess it was best she didn’t tell him that since she got a rose.
Later, during the cocktail party – since it was just her birthday and she figured out how easy it was to manipulate Brad, Michelle steals him away to ask him what his favorite place to get coffee is. Seriously. She’s a nut job who can’t handle not being the center of attention. I’m pretty sure that is obvious to everyone but Brad at this point.
Meanwhile – Raichel and Melissa are fighting. About something. That no one seems to understand. Thankfully everyone’s favorite couple Ali and Roberto stop by and in a surprising act of restraint - in that neither of them were dry-humping the other – interview all the ladies. Luckily, Raichel and Melissa are too stupid to keep their mouths shut and they feel the need to discuss their fight with everyone that will listen and they both get sent home that evening. Melissa – I’m no beauty queen, but someone needs to alert you to sunscreen and moisturizer because you aren’t aging so well sweetie. The phrase ‘rode hard and put up wet’ is all I can think when I look at you.
Emily (who I can’t look at without thinking that Dolly Parton and Tammy Wynette got together and did her hair and make-up) came out as the sweetheart of week 2. She got the last pre-ceremony rose.
Along with Raichel and Melissa, Keltie took her two-toned hair and high-kicked it back to Radio City Music Hall.
Can't wait to see what Week 3 brings!!
Krysta
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